my hearts desire

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the many provisions you have made for me and my family.  You have given us so much, and you are able to take it away.  While our finances sit in limbo right now and I wonder how we will pay for this house, or that car, or those furnaces, and so on, you continue to amaze me and provide.

Lord, I know the meaning of the word integrity, please let me live it, to the fullest, so that people may see me and think of You.  It seems satan attacks from all sides lately, whether it be a single doctors report, or a rant on facebook, Lord, we need your protection.  We need you far more than we need comfort, and ease.  You are our peace in times of trouble. You alone are our refuge in times of attack.  You are strong enough, and love us enough to fight for us so that we don't have to.  Please remind me when I am getting so caught up in the negative that I need to turn to you.  Sometimes it's just so easy to slip into that same old angry and worried funk.  I praise you because you are so generous to give me rest and peace, even when it seems our world is caving in.

I am reminded of some phrases from songs we do with the praise team, "You alone are worthy of our praise", "there is no one like our God, no there is no one like our God", and  "You alone are worthy of my praise."

My actions do not always match what is in my heart, but I think sometimes you allow troubles to find me in order that I can see what's in my heart.  Father, You already know my heart.  You know where I struggle even when I think I have a handle on it all.  Forgive me for being so cocky to think I've got it all figured out.  Forgive me for thinking that my plan is as sufficient as yours.  Forgive me for my anger towards those that insult me, for those that accuse me, and for those that hurt me.  You have called me to a new life, please stay with me Lord, alone I am nothing at all.

My heart hurts today because I know so much of what you've said, and I've only applied the parts that were easy enough.  Help me to apply your living word to every situation I encounter.

Thank you for this incredible gift of grace.  "Sin is broken, you have saved me, it is written, Christ is risen, Jesus you are Lord of all."

Humbly, and with a meekness, eager to receive Your implanted word, I commit all that I am, all that I have, all that I love and fear, to You Lord.  In your glorious name,  amen.

James chapter 1
James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, to the 12 tribes of Dispersion, Greetings.
Count it all joy my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.  And let steadfastness have it's full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God for it, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.  But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind.  For that person must suppose he will receive nothing from the Lord;  he is a double minded man, unstable in all his ways.
Let the lowly brother boast in his exaltation, and the rich in his humiliation, because like a flower of the grass he will pass away. For the sun rises with it's scorching heat and withers the grass, it's flower falls, and it's beauty perishes. So also will the rich made fade away in the midst of his pursuits.
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.  Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am tempted by God," for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one.  But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desires.  Then desire, when it has conceived, gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is fully grown brings death.
Do not be deceived my beloved brothers, every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of Lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.  Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.
Know this, my beloved brothers:  let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.  Therefore, put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.  For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror.  For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like.  But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets, but  a doer who acts, he will be blessed by his doing.
If anone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless.  Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this:  to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.